Contemplation
by Starsinger
Summary: Spock and Kirk, in that order, contemplate people in their lives and how they've been impacted by them.


**Contemplation**

by Starsinger

**Spock and Kirk, in that order, contemplate people in their lives and how they've been impacted by them. Don't own them.**

**Spock**

Spock heard the bustle of Sickbay around him, and felt M'Benga lead him over to a bed to examine him. His injuries weren't serious. It took only moments for M'Benga to diagnose and treat the fractures and bruises that came from fighting Khan. "You'll let me know if you feel dizzy or otherwise wrong?" M'Benga asked.

Spock nodded. How could he answer the man when the one person who had befriended him lay dead just feet away. His eyes never left the cryotube that McCoy had put Kirk in, or the doctor as he tended the last of the patients in sickbay. As cruel as it sounded, Kirk was dead, and could wait indefinitely in stasis. Spock was finally beginning to understand his counterparts comments about a friendship not yet realized in ways he couldn't begin to imagine. M'Benga released him with a firm promise to come back to see him the next day. Spock would keep that promise, he was Vulcan after all.

Spock slipped off the bed and walked over to the cryotube. A thin film of frost partially his the Captain's face from view. Jim's eyes were mercifully closed. He reached out a hand and rested it on over Jim's face. "Mr. Spock?" a voice intruded into his thoughts. Carol Marcus stood behind him, "Are you alright?"

"I've never really had a friend before. I had family and colleagues, Admiral Pike was a mentor, but Jim was the first person who ever tried to be my friend."

"What about Uhura?"

"We are more than friends," Spock said simply. It was true. "Kirk challenged me. He pushed me. He even cared enough to come back for me and all I did felt like betrayal to him."

"You were there with him at the end," Carol said softly. "You got to say good-bye."

"I don't want to say good-bye. I want that five year mission. I want to find out how much friendship means to the Universe. I don't want this to be the end," Spock said. Yes, he was emotionally compromised, but the mission was over. It was time to heal. Maybe, it was time to reach out to his father again.

McCoy walked over to the cryotube, his mouth set, he also put his hand on the tube. He was joined by Chekov, Uhura, Scotty, Sulu, and Carol. "Spock, I can't make any promises, but I'll be damned if I'm going to let this be the end," McCoy said in response. "It's enough we lost Admiral Pike. We won't lose Jim." They all stood there in silent thought, almost willing Jim back to life, back to their lives.

Their reverie was broken by the beep of the comm, "Doctor McCoy, Starfleet Medical is here to take you to Zurich in Shuttle Bay One."

"Thank you, Lieutenant Riley," McCoy answered. "Tell them we'll be right down." McCoy reached down and lifted the cooler containing Khan's blood. "Anyone care to join me?" It was almost a challenge. Spock stood behind the cryotube and pushed it down the corridor. Again, silent crewmembers stood at attention as they passed. A silent tribute to the Captain they so obviously loved.

"Is there anything we can do?" Uhura finally asked.

"If you believe in a God, I'd pray to him or her now," McCoy replied. "I'm afraid this will take a miracle." The shuttle door closed and they cleared the area. Their hopes and wishes were with McCoy and Kirk as they left the Enterprise.

**Kirk**

The bed was becoming uncomfortable. Kirk had once, for a fleeting instant, wondered what it would be like to lie around in bed all day and do nothing. He no longer wondered about that. He'd just moved into a regular room from ICU and had the debriefing from the Admiralty. Bones had put him back in bed personally, which didn't bother him, he was getting sleepy. His eyes closed, he really didn't like hospitals, or long stays in beds, but his body really wasn't giving him any choice in the matter.

Evening shadows fell as he awoke and noticed a slim, somewhat worn figure in the chair next to him. For a moment he thought, "Admiral Pike?"

A dry chuckle emerged, "No, Jim, although Chris was still alive." Jim's throat closed in grief. He had missed Pike's funeral. He should have been there. Archer must have must have read the emotions flitting across his face, "He would've understood why you couldn't be there, Jim."

"No, he wouldn't. He would have demanded to know what the hell I was thinking going after Khan like that. He would even have reamed me over the coals for getting myself killed," tears streamed down his face. He missed Chris so much.

"No, Jim, he would've understood. He would also have been proud of you for doing what you did." Archer reached into his briefcase and pulled something out. "I found this on his desk while we were clearing out his effects a couple of weeks ago. I think you should have it." With that, Archer put a framed photo on Jim's bedside table and left. The picture was of Jim, in a headlock being performed by Pike, who was giving him a noogie. Pike had a huge smile on his face. McCoy looked on with a laugh. It had been taken at the end of their first year and postings had just been made. Kirk was at the top of his class.

"When we left the Enterprise, I told everyone to pray if that's what they did, that this would take a miracle," McCoy's voice intruded into his thoughts. "I miss him too, Jim. I wish that miracle could've extended to him as well."

Kirk looked at the picture, and remembered the day, "I think Chris would want us to remember him as he was, not what happened to him." McCoy sat down in the recently vacated chair next to the bed. He pulled out the tiny figurine of a ballerina that Pike had given him for his last birthday. Kirk's breath caught in his throat. "He always knew how to make me feel better. Now, it's time for me to try it on my own."

"THAT starts by getting better," Bones replied. "Don't you fear, you'll be out of here soon enough. For now let's do it the way Pike would want you to do it." Kirk nodded in understanding. McCoy was right. There was plenty of time before Enterprise was ready, and he would be ready as well.


End file.
